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When Mom’s Plans Aren’t Enough: Pam Finds “Home” in a Caring Community

After her mother’s death, Pam struggled with trying to create a home and explored alternative living situations at an intentional community.

You are here: Home / Housing / When Mom’s Plans Aren’t Enough: Pam Finds “Home” in a Caring Community

April 6, 2014 //  by Shannon Doty


Pam’s mother promised that Pam would be able to stay in her family home and continue her existing lifestyle even when her mother was no longer around. Upon her mother’s death, Pam was fortunate to have siblings that were prepared to interview, hire, and manage the direct support staff Pam needed. The goal for Pam was for her to live as independently as possible in her family home with her beloved dog, “Rachel”.

Unfortunately, things did not go as Pam’s mother may have wanted. Although Pam was able to stay in her family home with 24/7 support staff, something was missing. The staff cared for Pam physically, however her greater potential was not being realized within the daily monotony of television programming and routine meals. In the video below, Pam and her sister, Jan, describe the struggle of trying to create the home Pam had with her mother in a house without Mom.

In facing the difficult decision as to whether or not to go against her mother’s wishes, Jan explored alternative living situations for her sister. She discovered Live Oak Living, an intentional community where 16 residents with traumatic brain injuries or developmental disabilities live. When Pam expressed anxiety towards her life ahead at Live Oak, the community-made special accommodations to ease her transition including constructing a fenced-in yard for “Rachel”. Pam moved into her own studio to start her new life in a community that embraces individual choice and is encultured with person-centered support. Now, Pam can stroll over to a friend’s house, attend classes if she desires, or simply go for a walk with “Rachel” to visit her new equine friends. Pam described a shopping trip with her sister, and though she missed going to see Captain America, she returned just in time for “Girls Night” that evening! To learn more about Pam’s experience, play the following video.

After the interview, one of the staff members suggested that Pam put in an application to work at the bakery down the street. In noting Pam’s initial reluctance, the staff reminded her of her delicious cheese pimento, which was just enough moral support to help Pam consider a new employment possibility.

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Category: Housing, Self-advocacyTag: autism, autism housing network, awareness, desiree kameka, Madison House Autism Foundation, residential housing, transitioning

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